I don’t want to win… I want to be a hero…

Hero ball is a basketball term for my problem. Fancy Play syndrome is a poker term for it.

It’s the desire and decisions based on a desire to feel smart, look cool, or ‘confuse’ our opponents. To heroically triumph against all odds. It’s the story book ending. The off balance heave at the buzzer. Nailing the absolute low and taking it to the high of the day.

I’ve always had some version of fancy play syndrome. When I was playing poker, I struggled to grind out basic solid bulletproof strategy, instead getting into creative difficult spots where I had to make tough decisions.

When I look at my trading it’s the same. I’m not motivated to win. I’m motivated to crush, to take all every possible move of the day. etc.

I realized basically I always want to win, but in a way that doesn’t involve steadiness or loss. Which means I’m not serious about winning.

Until I decide that making money is more important than playing the game of trading, I will always lose.

Until I decide that taking less trades and being disappointed is best, and being better at doing stuff. That patience in admitting that I’m not good enough to take all the trades I’d want to, and just wait for really good ones that the market is screaming at me to take.

I’ve got $1500 left on this sim funded acct. I’d like to get to a point where I can cash out. So it needs to be: $5600+.

The plan to do that is to take it outta my hands. 3 trades per day. $500 max loss set to auto-liquidate.